Archives for posts with tag: Book of Genesis

Most of us have heard the story.  Most of us have been annoyed with how simple it seems.  Many of us are just fed up with anecdotes that friends and family use as tools during the discomfort.

Maybe God put a fireman at our window.  Why turn it down?  Do we have more faith by staying in a fire or climbing down the ladder?

That fireman just so happens to have a bag full of shots, pills, appointments, and ultrasounds.  Is my desire to use a doctor out of less belief or out of gratefulness at what he has provided? So how does that fit with my belief that God will provide?  487fb1eac0d6825658bf69e2ed7849d7

I think it fits well.  God is big and has the capacity to move mountains.  He is the immeasurably more.  But the real question depends on what my faith is in.  Is my faith rooted in what my current situation is or in what he has already done?

True faith is rooted 100% in what God has done through Christ.  My redemption has been accomplished and my faith is that I have been saved.  I can have the richest of faith that does not depend on any current circumstances.  As I have come to make that realization I have come to accept that my faith in God is not rooted in whether or not we conceive.  It is rooted in the place that is being prepared for me.  If my faith waivers in times of infertility it is not a true faith.  It is a conditional faith that is rooted in  something that has not been promised.

So when it comes to anecdotes that question what God provides I can be confident that my faith does not waiver when I accept the hand of the rescuer.  I am reliant on a miracle to get me through infertility.  Only God can create life.  Science may be a tool he uses to do so.  That cannot lessen my faith in him………..especially if my faith is wholly in him.

-“Abram”

 

 

Hey fellow star-counters,

I think that’s what I’m going to call you guys. Star-counters. It’s a reference from the story of Abram and Sarah and you should totally check out the full thing in Genesis 15. But in my own words, Abram is having a hard night and he cries out to God, “Why haven’t you given me kids?!”

Been there? I have.

Many times.

So God tells him to go outside and look up at the stars. The God says to him;

“Look up at the sky and count the stars- if indeed you can count them.
So shall your offspring be.”

In the midst of Abram’s hopeless situation, God gives him a promise. God shows him hope. He causes Abram to look beyond his current situation. And I believe that God wants us to experience that same hope. He wants us to know He’s in control even when our hormones are not. He is the Prince of Peace and he wants us to know His peace even when we get another negative test result.

God may not have promised each one of us that our children will be as numerous as the stars in the sky. Or that we’d be able to have children naturally. Or even that our children will be perfectly healthy when we finally get them. But he has promised to be in control. One of my favorite promises that He’s made comes from Jeremiah 29:11:

“For I know the plans I have for you”, declares the Lord.
“Plans to prosper you and not to harm you.
Plans to give you a hope and a future.”

So if the challenges of today are more than you can bear, take time to look up and count the stars. Remember the promises that God has made to you. He wants to prosper you and He has plans for your future.

I’ll be counting stars with you.

-S

if you truly trust God with all your heart,

if you truly trust that he has perfect timing,

is turning to science lack of faith?

is turning from a natural pregnancy to pills and shots a “Hagar moment” (See Genesis 16)?

God’s promise

welcome to my last month.  my mind has raced at night.  my mind played some nasty tricks on me

in the end i had to come to the harsh realization that those stars i count at night are not specific promises to me.  I have not been told by God that he has a cute little chubby cheeked version of me all planned out.  i have no idea if that is His plan.  i can only know he loves me.

our life of supplements and acupuncture and pregnancy teas has turned into heavy drugs,giving my wife a shot in her belly, and watching my precious “Sarah” leave early for numerous blood tests and ultrasounds.  this is no longer “natural”, but it is still putting faith in God.

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11)

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:28-29)

God’s provision

God has provided us with talented doctors and nurses.  He has risen people up with the skills to help cure our problem.  He has blessed us with the ability to pay for these insane doctor bills.  How is this not provision?

We have all heard the cliché stories of the man stuck in the fire that did not let the fireman rescue him since he was waiting on God.  As silly as that story is, i think it would be irresponsible for us as a couple not to try the avenues that were put before us.  even in this process, we rely on God alone to use these medical procedures to get us through.

God’s Compassion

This brings me to the major lesson I have learned while studying healing in the bible.  God has compassion for us and this empty part of me hurts him too.

“When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, He had compassion on them and healed their sick” (Matthew 14:14). 

“Jesus had compassion on them and touched their eyes. Immediately they received their sight and followed Him” (Matthew 20:34). 

God hurts for us and I believe he wants us to go through this process of redemption.  as much as it feels like he does not care about all of the work i have done in his name over the years, he has compassion on me.  me searching for a way to get pregnant is not a slap in the face to God.  He is ultimately in control and i am following my dreams.

Fresco with image of Abraham to sacrifice his ...

Image via Wikipedia

you are correct

my name is not “Abram”, but i would rather not have my real name anywhere on this blog so I can be honest.  i chose Abram (who you may know as Abraham) because he was promised offspring by God and had a very tough time waiting.  in Genesis 16, Abram was so frustrated that God had not come through that he slept with Sarai’s servant, who had Ishmael.  this was when he was 86 years old.  his firstborn with Sarai did not come until he was 99, thirteen years later.  Abram must have spent many nights outside counting the stars and struggling with God’s promises.  i can relate to him.  he was called by God to stick by his wife and wait for the blessing.  this blessing came much later and was in God’s timing.

i want this to be a place for those of us counting those stars.  i want to provide a place for men to discuss, chew on, and support each other.  i want us to be able to wait for Isaac in a way that lifts up God.

i also want to have a place to lay out the journey.  this will hopefully one day be a testament to how faithful our God is.

my wife, “sarah”, is an amazing woman of God who will also detail out this process that has been very difficult for the last years.  i pray that she can both encourage and support those who have been going through a similar situation.

i am very saddened that infertility has been mostly ignored in my social circles and i do not really have any mentors in this area because it is a very personal issue.

i have also noted that there is very little information out there for men going through this.  this has been a very difficult process and can be very damaging to a marriage if not tackled with hard work and intent.  my hope is that my portion of this blog can be helpful with encouragement and some insight on how we might be better supporters of our wives or families.

God is not safe, but he is good.  may our belief be credited to us as righteousness.

-A-

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